chemical burns, tvs, horror food, pit bull history, and masked hilarity

Today I learned that a bunch of sorority girls got chemical burns on a slip-and-slide lubricated with laundry detergent. Somehow this was supposed to raise money for firemen. Three things:

1. "He added, 'We're really fortunate that the women in Greek life on campus really made the event special.'"
2. When you've been out of college for a while and your only contact is articles like this, it makes you wonder how any college students survive long enough to graduate.
3. Laundry detergent will kill you, but not in a way I had considered.

Also,

• Old tvs are funny looking.
• A canned whole chicken could be used for a horror movie.
• Pit bulls as we know them today are not actually pit bulls. Real pit bulls, renamed Staffordshire terriers or American Staffordshire terriers around 1936, were medium-sized, perfectly good basic working dogs. The ones you hear about in the news today are essentially the puppy-mill products of a mixture of breeds, and I can expound for hours on the topic of badly-bred dogs. You can see them on the street if you look -- some of them, when they walk, look like they were assembled by Frankenstein, but without the bolts sticking out.

And now I have a good physical understanding of why dogs fuss at you when you crinkle paper around them, with an added hilarity bonus for those of us who have much too much experience wearing respirators.