sleeping in a good place and groceries

Overnight I learned that if I use four yards (4 m) of almost two-year-old, ugly conventional cotton terry cloth for a bed pad instead of my stupidly-expensive organic cotton bed pad that is stubbornly retaining detergent residue, I can sleep in the bed in the master bedroom again. I have thus reduced the time it takes for me to get back in the real bed after losing another detergent from something like three months to three weeks. To be fair, I'm pretty sure I avoided screwing up my immune system this time, so everything is going better.

Since I slept well and felt good, I went out grocery shopping, which unfortunately still makes me kind of stupid, so I can't think up anything funny to say about learning a British term for misplaced apostrophes:

Shopkeepers sometimes advertise apple's and pear's for sale, hence the term greengrocer's apostrophe.

I know there's a good snarky comment out there somewhere, but I'm going to go commune with the nice bed again.